Thursday, August 18, 2011

Slipping Through My Fingers

Each time Warren reaches a developmental marker, such as rolling over, outgrowing the Bumbo chair or nearly sitting up on his own, I cry and cry. Stop growing up baby!!!

He's moved on to solid food and is so pleased with himself. I cry with every spoonful!

Seriously. I get very emotional about this. Time is moving too fast.

And it's not just my youngest baby- but my oldest son too. Tustin has been gone all week at Boy Scout Camp, earning his merit badges, having the time of his life and most likely not stopping to miss us at all.  It is my first time sending him away for something like this and I, on the other hand, am really feeling his absence. I miss my big boy. I can't wait for him to get back tomorrow night. I hope this gets easier in the coming years...but I doubt it will.

Often, as I'm gathering clothes that Laura has outgrown and preparing them to give away, I find myself stroking the fabrics and reminiscing on sweet memories of her dancing and bouncing around in them.

 These are also the times when my husband loves to pass me in the hallway singing, "Slipping Through my Fingers," from Mama Mia, knowing that I am helpless to the power of that song, and will immedietly collapse into sobs!  If you are not familiar with this song, then take a moment, get a box of tissues and watch. If you are a mother- especially to a daughter, make sure someone is with you. You are going to need a hug.

This week my husband sent me a link to a short article written by Joshua Brown, on The Reformed Broker. A new school year has moms and dads alike feeling my sadness. I thought he expressed it beautifully:

My daughter's going to kindergarten in two weeks and my son just stopped taking naps on Wednesday.  I was at work but this is what I've been told.  Just out of nowhere, he's a baby and then he's not.  And the little girl whose crib I slept on the floor next to will be walking into a school with 12-year-olds in it.  I swear she was born yesterday.  I can't throw away another stroller or see another garbage bag filled with the baby toys that so many of my memories are attached to.  And if I can't stop or at least slow these kids down from growing up I think I might just lose it...i just want to stop time. Or at least slow it down.
Mr. Brown, I know just how you feel. 


Britney said...

Oh Amanda,

I feel your pain. I feel the exact same way. My heart (and stomach)all ache at the same time when I have those moments of realizing that time really just keeps on going and so very quickly. If I could do anything or have any special power it would be to make time slow down or stop for awhile. I'm trying to really savor and enjoy what I've got right now. No one ever warned me that it would be so painful to watch my children grow up. You captured all of my feelings so perfectly.

p.s. you however don't seem to have aged AT ALL!!! How do you do that? Why do you always look so amazing?!?

Anne said...

now i'm crying! beautiful post from a beautiful mommy.

Denise said...

Oh goodness! Why did I click on your bog this morning? I was trying to kill time as I'm getting Eliza ready for her first day of kindergarten and trying not to think too much about it! I love the photos of you with your kids -- beautiful! And that baby just gets cuter every day.

Denise said...

I meant blog -- not bog! Ugh, mommy brain.


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